I have a secret.

I love secrets. They remind me of ninjas, because ninjas are basically real life secrets personified. And I think ninjas are cool.

Anyway, back to my secret. You know how Clark Kent had a day job as a journalist, but secretly he lived this super-human life at night? Well, I’m the same way, but in reverse. I’m a bartender by night and a super-human by day. Everybody who comes into my restaurant thinks that I’m just some regular Joe Shmo with a button-up shirt and tie who knows how to make a decent vodka martini up or on the rocks. What they don’t know is that hours before I got to my night job, in my secret life, I RAN more miles than what they’ve DRIVEN for the day. And I take a lot of pride in knowing that. And knowing that they don’t know that. In fact, they barely know that it’s humanly possible to run as many as 10, 15 or 20 miles all at once.

Speaking of humanly possible, let’s just touch on how the marathon figures into that little category. Humans might have been intended to run from the dawn of time, but they were not intended to run 26.2 miles. You know how I know? Because the first guy who did it died – Pheidippides, may you rest in peace. That’s right, the first time someone tried this little stunt that we know today as the marathon, he keeled over and kicked the big bucket minutes after crossing the “finish line.” (Talk about the ultimate finish line.) Of course since then, we’ve improved quite a bit, and it’s become somewhat humanly possible to complete the marathon. But rest assured, as I do, that when you complete a marathon, you are accomplishing a task that was not always humanly possible. Today the most daring individuals find it to be semi-possible. Making them real-life, semi-super-humans.

Happy Running.